I'm so fucking centered right now
I just saw a hot homeless man
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize