how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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