im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I just want nice things and good sex
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
