the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
