Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
