he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
