i think my mom watched the whole time
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
