She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
