I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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