also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize