Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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