Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
