He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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