I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
