My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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