belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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