I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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