She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
