So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
