i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
