I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
