I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
you will always have a special place in my vag
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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