New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
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