you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
