This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
The Olympian is in my bed
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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