Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
