Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Life is so much better after having sex.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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