yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
