I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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