can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
