He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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