you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
