Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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