Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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