its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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