why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
