No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
pray to the hookup gods
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