hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
you inspire me to be a worse person
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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