No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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