Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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