We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
