You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
