wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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