How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
