remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I don't think brook has ever known best
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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