He is an equal opportunity slut.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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