I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
