If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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