Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
