one might say we're banned from that church
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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