Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
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